Hopelessly!

Oh, it's hopeless I say
There's no other way
Putting you and me together
Is like weighing stone with feathers!

Things aren't what they used to be
It would work if I believed in me
If the hero in me weren't Hamlet
And life weren't Russian Roulette!

You'd do better with a lass all coy
Who'd steal your heart, but love you boy!
You'd be the king of her heart
And kill the dragon, scale her fort!

I'm no woman for the ages
I enrage even sages
My exploits are legendary
You, for me, will remain secondary!

I'll break your heart, chew your bones
Our shouting matches will splinter stones
Never will I rise to your expectation
Though you may choose to give in to temptation!

So now boy, heed my warning, stay away!
While you still have a heatrt, unswayed
For I may decide to fall for you
And if I do, even the Good Lord wouldn't come to your rescue!